For A Better Tomorrow

I have been running tough lately and this stretch has been so long that I have now taken a step back to think about my game some more. I’m still running positive every month with enough cash for my survival but I just haven’t been too happy with my winrate as of late. A friend of mine (who knows nothing of poker) is concerned whenever I’m stressed, he asks me if I’ve been making money in poker. I sorta smiled because a “bad month” to me is a great wage in real life. So in the end, I really have nothing to complain about, especially to friends who are working day jobs. But to be honest, I just can’t help it much. I would go to my roommate and talk to him about running bad and it’ll become the same cycle. Running bad > Getting Frustrated> Complaining to roommate> Talk about it > Then realize how great we have it. I’ve been training this roommate recently and he’d walk into my room telling me over and over, “I just can’t believe how tough this is”. And this was pretty much what I said to him “We are gunning for something extraordinary, of course it’s going to be rough”. And within that moment, the tilt and complaints from both of us are gone.

I guess every poker player needs to be reminded of this. We are all trying to succeed in something that’s out of the ordinary. Everyone has the idea of going to school to get a college degree and finding a job embedded in their heads all their life. But we however, are rejecting the normal life and are going for something else, something spectacular. And for that, we will have a certain degree of downfall in our lives. And that is something I’m trying to become stronger with. I feel as if my emotional health is really deteriorating. The highs and lows are really taking a toll, especially during the low times. It’s either that, or my physical health working at 8-5’s.

I recently read a thread posted a couple years ago about a guy who is trying to find evidence of poker softwares rigging games. I forget where this thread is but to sum up his theory, he believes that it is just too profitable for sites not to do it. He came up with this idea where sites would have a time “to feed the fish”. It’s like a switch when it’s time to feed the fishes of the site. I remember laughing when reading this thread prior to the legislation. However, with less fishes post legislation, on top of my running tough and not making as much, a thought did cross my mind that maybe sites are in fact doing that. However, I just shrugged it off and laughed at my insecure stupidity. See what running tough can do to you? It makes you become delusional. That is the reason why I believe every poker player needs to be able to think outside the box.